JENSIZED LAST ACTIVITY IN MEMPHIS TOWN

Introducing Mrs. Clarke (the wedding graduate)

By Jen

© Annabella Charles — thank you for making us look totally amazing!

There is a certain type of woman who begins imagining — and even planning — her wedding when she’s a little girl.

She knows all the details: how many bridesmaids she’ll have, what flavor her cake will be, what song will be playing as her new husband twirls her around the ballroom floor…

I am not that type of woman. I’ve never understood how someone can formulate such a precise, detailed vision without one of the most important pieces of a wedding: the groom.

Once we started planning everything I noticed the things I was most drawn to were the ones that made me say “This is so us.” It’s why when we toured our venue, the Jack Robinson Gallery, I was ready to run to the ATM and take out the deposit money soon after I walked in the door.

It’s why we were sold on our caterer when we saw the words “BBQ nachos” on their menu (and we were affirmed when told we could get Gus’s chicken brought in). And it’s why the idea for our decor was sparked when I looked at a stack of records that’s been sitting next to my desk for more than six months.

I worried a lot, when I lost my job, that we weren’t going to be able to have the wedding we wanted. That didn’t happen at all. In fact I feel like all the help we got from our talented friends and family made the wedding more special. More intimate, even though there were at least 100 people there. More us.

My nerves peaked Friday. We left Brian’s groom’s cake in the car and the icing partly melted while we had lunch at Felicia Suzanne’s. In hindsight, I should have iced it at the venue, but oh well. It turned out fine. (Lunch was amazing, by the way.) My sister was making our cake, and it was taking longer than we’d expected. Our kitchen got trashed in the process.

Before rehearsal I tried to direct a dozen or so well-meaning folks trying to hang decorations and set out tablecloths, and all the people coming at me from every direction made me want to hide in the bathroom and cry.

I spent much of dinner trying not to think about all the wedding booze sitting in the hatch of my Fit, parked on Madison Ave., out there ripe for the stealin’. And later, after we got the venue mostly set up, came the task of figuring out where my car and myself would spend the night. (Would I even sleep? Yes, with a little help from Beale Street libations.)

Saturday, though, I was lucid. I went home and finished packing, stopped at Target to grab some last-minute essentials, fixed Brian’s cake at the venue, told the guys where to put everything else and headed to The Madison. There was nothing left to panic about.

Wait, yes there was. Since we were having a friend marry us, and we wanted a short ceremony, we were writing our own vows.

I hadn’t finished mine. I hadn’t even started them, actually. I was so concerned about choosing the right words that I procrastinated. I knew I’d go through a whole ream of paper trying to come up with the perfect vows.

Eventually my bridesmaids started arriving at the hotel, and the champagne started flowing. I decided to just wing it.

And wouldn’t you know, during the reception several people told me my lack of preparation was what made them get teary-eyed. Brian gloated that for once, he was the one who had his act together.

Either everything ran pretty smoothly that Saturday night, or our friends did an awesome job insulating me from drama and conflict. Maybe there are a few things I would have changed if I’d known better, but everything looked as I’d imagined it would. I danced and drank champagne and St. Germain all night. And then we went to Mollie Fontaine’s and did car bombs. It was the best wedding I’ve ever had.

If I could take a time machine to 11 months ago, here’s what I’d tell newly-engaged me:

• The checklists on wedding websites such as The Knot are helpful but don’t let them run your life. “Your mileage may vary,” as they say. The venue and the photographer are the only things you really need to get on ASAP. Oh, and the groom. (See what I did there?)
• Don’t be afraid to ask for help. You can’t do everything yourself.
• Don’t worry about things you can’t control.
• Late-night trips to the gym are like meditation. Push yourself and go as often as you can.
• Your house will be a total mess for about a month. Try not to stress about it too much. Things will get back to normal eventually.

Wanna see a few photos? Check out our sneak peek.